Welcome to the world Hailey Grace!

Well, she finally made it!! On May 18th, 2009 at 10:17 a.m. Hailey Grace Arens entered the world, and she came FAST!!!!

I was set to arrive at the hospital on May 18th at 8:00 am to be induced. I was already 5cm dilated, but she was not coming so they thought they would speed things along. The doctor came into my room that morning at 8:50 am to break my water and at about 8:51 my contractions started and they started strong!!!! Keep in mind that when I arrived that morning, before even getting changed into my gown I told the nurse I wanted an epidural, and I didn't want to feel anything. She told the doctor that, many times, but apparently he didn't hear her. At 9:45 am, after many hard contractions and a lot of pain, my true love showed up.... the anesthesiologist. I know I was probably a little pushy and rude to this man but I think he understood. Not only was I a woman in labor, but little did everyone know that my baby was ready.... very ready to come out. As he was putting my epidural in I felt the sudden urge to push but everyone kept telling me "don't push," "breath through it." Lets just say that was much easier said than done. The anesthesiologist laid me down fast, and the nurse checked me to find out that my baby's head was crowning and I needed to start pushing. Not only that but the baby's heart rate had dropped from 120 to the 60's and 70's. Everyone was getting a little concerned so they got the doctor in there fast, and we started pushing. At 10:17, Hailey Grace entered the world... quietly!! Yes, I said quietly. It was a little weird. I kept asking if she was ok, and she was.... I guess she just didn't feel the need to scream!! :o)

The rest is just history..... a few days in the hospital and we're home. I am feeling great.... better than ever!! Aiden is adjusting well, or as well as he can. He loves his sister. He is constantly trying to share his toys, and even his very own blanket. It is pretty cute. There have been a few times though that the jealousy comes out. He doesn't do anything to her (thank god) but he gets very clingy with me. I feel so bad for him... I am still learning how to divide my attention to two children who need me more than ever. Its times like these I wish Gary was here. I think a lot of couples who have multiple children take the naps, baths, and eating for granted. I have wanted to soak in a warm bath for 2 days but it just isn't in the schedule so I just take my usual shower in the morning. A nap would be wonderful but there is always something I have to do. I don't want to get behind on my laundry, or my dishes so I do that. When I do finally sit down Hailey has to eat or be changed. This goes on throughout the day... then just when I think "I could take a nap now" I have to go get Aiden from daycare. Then there is no rest. I feel bad sticking him in front of the tv for hours (especially when it is nice outside) so we have to play. Luckily my sister has been down twice to help out. She has taken him to the park, out for bike rides, and just plays with him. Thanks Allison!! It has helped so much, but now I get this guilt trip that I should be the one doing all that so he doesn't feel like mommy doesn't love him anymore, and trust me, as bad as that might sound. I am pretty sure the thought has entered his mind in the last few days. On the first night home when it was time to go to bed I laid Aiden down and told him he had to lay there until mommy got done feeding Hailey. That was hard for him. Night time is when we lay together, talk, pray, and snuggle and for one of the first times my child had to put himself to sleep and that breaks my heart!! This is so hard to do alone.... so hard. I have had all the help in the world offered to me, and it isn't that I don't want it, I appreciate, it is just that it will never be the same as having Daddy here.

Oh, speaking of daddy..... I suppose many of you are wondering how daddy found out that the baby came. Well, it was kind of easy actually... easier than I thought it would be. I was sending him e-mails from my blackberry phone throughout the morning to keep him updated on what was going on. Then after she was born she sent lots of pictures. My brave sister Cindy (who doesn't have children and never watched a birth) was brave enough to tape it for me. She did an incredible job so now we are going to send that video to Gary so he can watch the miracle himself!! Since we have been home we have talked to daddy on the phone and computer a few times. However, the internet connection is horrible over there so when we talk in the web cam it is so fuzzy you can't make out a face, and the connection is so bad that when you talk it cuts out the entire time. If I could give him better internet right now, I would. All I want is for my husband to be able to see his child since he can't be here. I didn't think that was too much to ask, but apprently it is. As I always say though, everyday is one day closer to him coming home.

Well... time to feed baby. I will post soon with updates on how I am adjusting to sleepless nights, endless feedings!!! :o)